Having Friends
Meshing Friendships with Family
Meshing Friendships with Family
1. Put marriage and family before friendships, within reason, because God seems to set such priorities, and it makes sense. However, marriage and family should never eliminate the possibility of one to three close friendships for each person. Those with big families or many responsibilities will have far less time for friendships and may need to meet less often. Marriages and families will be stronger if husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, have friends. See Submit to God Together
2. Whenever possible, bring your family along when you serve God with friends. Or tell your family about it. Children need to learn that doing good things in God’s name is an expected part of friendship. See Serve God Together
3. Consider your friends’ families as belonging to you in that they are to be a part of your interest and concern, whether or not you ever actually meet them. Once a person becomes a good friend, then his or her loved ones become your concern to some degree. If you do not care, then you are not a good friend to someone who has a spouse or family. See Belong to One Another
4. Be dedicated to your friends’ marriages and families without getting in the way of their success. If you are single or have a less complicated family, you will need more friends if some of your friends have a lot of family responsibilities. Do not dominate a friend’s time, but still think of that friend’s family and its needs. See Be Devoted to One Another
5. At times, help your friends’ families when they need extra help. And let them help you when you need extra hands. Kids will feel more secure if they know that their parents have friends who will be available to help if needed. It is okay to keep friendships separate from family activities, but not if help is needed. See Serve One Another
6. When you can, help your friends’ families obtain food, clothing and shelter during emergencies and tough economic times. The cost of deeper Christian friendship means watching to see that each other’s families have the basic necessities of life. See Meet One Another’s Needs
7. Whenever a sin of yours threatens your family, it might need to be confessed only to your closest friends if it will hurt your family too much or is more than your family can bear. Since it must be confessed for healing to start, friends can be essential to the survival of the family and friends. See Confess Sins to One Another
8. Make sure that your friends fulfill their responsibilities to their families. This is not just because your friends’ families belong to you somewhat and require your devotion. Your friendship and its activities can be threatened if marital or family discord erupts. Read See That Each One Does His or Her Part
9. Know your friends well enough to recognize dangers headed their way that could negatively affect their marriages or families. Your objective view will at times spot these dangers and temptations before your friend is aware. You, in this way, are a kind of safety alarm for your friends’ families. See Warn and Admonish One Another
10. Join with your friend in his or her battle not to give in to a temptation you have warned about or he or she has told you of. The temptation is not a sin, but is a sin waiting to happen. If you do not join the battle against that sin, just staying uninvolved is a sin, whether or not your friend gives in. Your friendship could be seriously inhibited if your friend falls into a temptation that is harmful to his or her marriage and family. See Battle Temptation Together
11. Look out for the good of your friends’ marriages and families. In doing so you are looking out for the good of your friends. Your friends’ contentment cannot be separated from the happiness of their marriages and families. See Look Out for One Another’s Good
12. Do what you can to stop mistreatment of your friend by his or her spouse or children. This may be a very difficult task, so gather your group of friends, including the mistreated friend, and put much prayer and discussion into it before taking action. Many situations can be helped by friends pleading with God as well as interceding with the spouse or children. See Forbid Mistreatment of One Another