Part One: Chapter 2
Faith Together Must Become Essential
Hundreds of Scripture verses and passages detail what God wants Christians to do together. Obedience to these Bible instructions is essential to (1) becoming more like Jesus, (2) adding worship to lifestyle, (3) battling Satan and evil, and (4) preparing for relationship with God, enjoyment, and citizenship in heaven.
The 65 Togethers of Scripture encompass hundreds of Scriptures to help us glorify God and develop our spirits into Christlikeness. Faith Together through deeper obedience to the Scriptures that make up these Togethers cannot be done effectively in larger fellowships. Thus, especially critical is each believer’s Christian Inner Circle consisting of his or her closest Christian friends, family members, and, if applicable, spouse. By doing what God wants us to do when together within the intensity of our Christian friendships, Christ-guided families, and God-centered marriages, change in our spirits will explode.
Faith Together forces Bible knowledge into action which changes our spirits. It is doing the Bible with one another in normal daily life that produces the deep changes in our spirits. Knowledge can only go so far, but obedience to the word of God in living action purifies our spirits. Obeying the Bible in its instructions for Christian relationships emphatically affects everything now – and everything later in heaven – forever!
Rather train yourself for godliness;
for while bodily training is of some value,
godliness is of value in every way,
as it holds promise for the present life
and also for the life to come.
1 Tim 4:7b-8
for while bodily training is of some value,
godliness is of value in every way,
as it holds promise for the present life
and also for the life to come.
1 Tim 4:7b-8
We have been trained by sermons and books to focus on our own individual growth, as if it can happen without help from one another. Sermons, for example, teach us about hope, but not how we must help one another convert that knowledge to lifestyle. Bible obedience requires relationships, so it is no mystery why settling for only knowledge limits Scripture application and faith remains weak.
Individualized faith is contrary to Scripture. God did not design the human race for autonomy, but for faith together. Although one of us and God would seem to be sufficient, it is not. God did not want it to be so.
Individualized faith is contrary to Scripture. God did not design the human race for autonomy, but for faith together. Although one of us and God would seem to be sufficient, it is not. God did not want it to be so.
Then the Lord God said,
“It is not good that the man should be alone;
I will make him a helper fit for him.”
Gen 2:18
“It is not good that the man should be alone;
I will make him a helper fit for him.”
Gen 2:18
It is as if we consider Genesis 2:18 no longer truth. This most crucial verse in the Bible seems to have been compromised. It is usually referenced only when considering marriage. Obviously if Adam needed a helper before he sinned, any sinful individual thereafter has needed a helper.
* God designed us to be able to do His will only with help from one another. *
We must not minimize the implications of God’s design and plan. We need one another to live for God. All Adam and Eve were asked to do was not eat of one tree among hundreds! Even without sin, they forgot to help one another resist Satan’s lies and temptations. We who are already sinful are in worse shape than they were. We need to constantly keep in mind that we need one another’s help to obey the Bible.
There are some things we can do alone. But not as well as in relationship with other believers. Someone who runs can certainly do so, but running against better runners is necessary for excellence to develop. We can each read our Bibles, but we will grow in knowledge more if we discuss the Bible with trusted friends and relatives.
An aging football player passes his skills on to younger players. An ice skater has a coach. Similarly, each of us will be able to grow further into our faith in relationship with other Christians with whom we are close and have regular contact, as long as we let the Holy Spirit guide us.
Most things of the kingdom of God must be accomplished by Christians together. Sometimes that is a single Christian doing something that needs support by others, such as prayer, encouragement, and counsel. At other times there are tasks needed by the Lord that must be done by more than one believer because multiple various spiritual strengths and contributions are needed. And there are many tasks that need to be done with one another. Christian friendships, Christian families, and Christian marriages often require one of these three aspects of Faith Together. All such situations change our spirits to conform with that of Jesus.
The devil knows the necessity of deeper Christian relationships for believers to become more like Jesus. Therefore, his strategy is to divide Christians and offer us things God does not want for us. Satan did this in the Garden of Eden when he offered individual choices by speaking only to Eve, effectively separating her from Adam. We are strong enough to defeat Satan and do what God wants when we obey what the Bible says we must do together. Alone, we are too weak.
Thus, focus on individualistic faith is disastrous. Individualized Christianity does not please God who wants a people, not a person, as His own. Autonomous Christianity does not push us far enough to significantly become more like Jesus. Independent Christianity downplays lifestyle worship and squelches reflecting much of God’s glorious character back to Himself. Solo Christianity battles Satan weakly. And unaccompanied Christianity hardly prepares us for life in heaven. Individualistic Christianity keeps a believer’s faith small, undressed and naked without the beautiful clothing woven by the intricacy of close, obedient Christian relationships.
Individualistic Christianity is an oxymoron. Faith Together solves the problem.
Most Christians still think that the faith of their Christian friends and relatives is a private matter and not their concern. This misconception needs to end. Sermons, Bible studies and small groups need to expect Christians to take responsibility for one another’s transformation into the image of Christ and preparation for heaven.
God has instructed us to interact with one another in specific ways. Biblical obedience when Christians are together is the fire that powers transformation into the likeness of Jesus Christ. The Togethers of Scripture make Christian friendships, families and marriages more than just wonderful and enjoyable. They make them Kingdom of God meaningful because life together obeying Scripture is the key to growing more and more into the image of Jesus and preparing for citizenship heaven.
Only in our closer Christian relationships is there time to get to know one another well enough to significantly obey the Scriptures that will make us more like Jesus. Our Christian Inner Circles of deep relationships of faith set the stage for us to change to think and act like our Lord. Frequent contact requires the Togethers that bring growth to our spirits.
Faith Together in our Christian friendships, families, and marriages is how we are to face the challenges of life and assignments from God. For example, where can we learn to forgive as well as in our closest relationships where we are occasionally hurt but the relationship is too important not to forgive? Deeper levels of forgiveness bring deeper forgiveness from God (Luke 6:37-38) and greater joy in our salvation.
For the deep spiritual growth we want before we enter heaven, much more than casual relationships in church activities is required. What is absolutely necessary is the smaller, committed, more intense, essential relationships with those in our inner circle of Christian friends and relatives. It is here that Jesus promises to be most present.
There are some things we can do alone. But not as well as in relationship with other believers. Someone who runs can certainly do so, but running against better runners is necessary for excellence to develop. We can each read our Bibles, but we will grow in knowledge more if we discuss the Bible with trusted friends and relatives.
An aging football player passes his skills on to younger players. An ice skater has a coach. Similarly, each of us will be able to grow further into our faith in relationship with other Christians with whom we are close and have regular contact, as long as we let the Holy Spirit guide us.
Most things of the kingdom of God must be accomplished by Christians together. Sometimes that is a single Christian doing something that needs support by others, such as prayer, encouragement, and counsel. At other times there are tasks needed by the Lord that must be done by more than one believer because multiple various spiritual strengths and contributions are needed. And there are many tasks that need to be done with one another. Christian friendships, Christian families, and Christian marriages often require one of these three aspects of Faith Together. All such situations change our spirits to conform with that of Jesus.
The devil knows the necessity of deeper Christian relationships for believers to become more like Jesus. Therefore, his strategy is to divide Christians and offer us things God does not want for us. Satan did this in the Garden of Eden when he offered individual choices by speaking only to Eve, effectively separating her from Adam. We are strong enough to defeat Satan and do what God wants when we obey what the Bible says we must do together. Alone, we are too weak.
Thus, focus on individualistic faith is disastrous. Individualized Christianity does not please God who wants a people, not a person, as His own. Autonomous Christianity does not push us far enough to significantly become more like Jesus. Independent Christianity downplays lifestyle worship and squelches reflecting much of God’s glorious character back to Himself. Solo Christianity battles Satan weakly. And unaccompanied Christianity hardly prepares us for life in heaven. Individualistic Christianity keeps a believer’s faith small, undressed and naked without the beautiful clothing woven by the intricacy of close, obedient Christian relationships.
Individualistic Christianity is an oxymoron. Faith Together solves the problem.
Most Christians still think that the faith of their Christian friends and relatives is a private matter and not their concern. This misconception needs to end. Sermons, Bible studies and small groups need to expect Christians to take responsibility for one another’s transformation into the image of Christ and preparation for heaven.
God has instructed us to interact with one another in specific ways. Biblical obedience when Christians are together is the fire that powers transformation into the likeness of Jesus Christ. The Togethers of Scripture make Christian friendships, families and marriages more than just wonderful and enjoyable. They make them Kingdom of God meaningful because life together obeying Scripture is the key to growing more and more into the image of Jesus and preparing for citizenship heaven.
Only in our closer Christian relationships is there time to get to know one another well enough to significantly obey the Scriptures that will make us more like Jesus. Our Christian Inner Circles of deep relationships of faith set the stage for us to change to think and act like our Lord. Frequent contact requires the Togethers that bring growth to our spirits.
Faith Together in our Christian friendships, families, and marriages is how we are to face the challenges of life and assignments from God. For example, where can we learn to forgive as well as in our closest relationships where we are occasionally hurt but the relationship is too important not to forgive? Deeper levels of forgiveness bring deeper forgiveness from God (Luke 6:37-38) and greater joy in our salvation.
For the deep spiritual growth we want before we enter heaven, much more than casual relationships in church activities is required. What is absolutely necessary is the smaller, committed, more intense, essential relationships with those in our inner circle of Christian friends and relatives. It is here that Jesus promises to be most present.
For where two or three are gathered in my name,
there am I among them.”
Matthew 18:20
there am I among them.”
Matthew 18:20
These deeply biblical relationships are the power of the church. What a shame that their power to change our spirits is generally ignored. We must bring individual faith into submission to Faith Together.
Almost always when God’s people have disappointed Him they have acted alone, severely damaging their own faithfulness and putting the lives of others at great risk. King David was alone and private when he committed adultery and murder. Achan (Joshua 7) was alone and stole things that belonged to God – and God said all of Israel sinned. Soldiers died needlessly.
Clearly, for their own good but more importantly to not dishonor God, these people needed help from their closest Christian relationships to do what was right. Today we listen to sermons and read Christian books that tell us to make spiritual progress by just individually knowing the truth, not even hinting that we must have help from our friends, spouse, or family to put truth into practice.
In larger fellowships of Christians, relationships will be less personal. There is no mystery to this as trust must be proven for transparency to bloom. Jesus’ presence can be much more influential in smaller open and honest relationships. That is part of the explanation why Jesus said, “For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.” Relationships of a few believers is where the presence of Jesus is most powerful.
How Jesus said He knows we love Him is key to understanding the high priority of “2 or 3 with Jesus” relationships. To fully understand this, we mentally have to grasp Jesus’ last hours with His disciples. This intimate time Jesus had with His disciples covers all four chapters of John 13, 14, 15 and 16. In the middle of this very intimate time, Jesus made this declaration:
Almost always when God’s people have disappointed Him they have acted alone, severely damaging their own faithfulness and putting the lives of others at great risk. King David was alone and private when he committed adultery and murder. Achan (Joshua 7) was alone and stole things that belonged to God – and God said all of Israel sinned. Soldiers died needlessly.
Clearly, for their own good but more importantly to not dishonor God, these people needed help from their closest Christian relationships to do what was right. Today we listen to sermons and read Christian books that tell us to make spiritual progress by just individually knowing the truth, not even hinting that we must have help from our friends, spouse, or family to put truth into practice.
In larger fellowships of Christians, relationships will be less personal. There is no mystery to this as trust must be proven for transparency to bloom. Jesus’ presence can be much more influential in smaller open and honest relationships. That is part of the explanation why Jesus said, “For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them.” Relationships of a few believers is where the presence of Jesus is most powerful.
How Jesus said He knows we love Him is key to understanding the high priority of “2 or 3 with Jesus” relationships. To fully understand this, we mentally have to grasp Jesus’ last hours with His disciples. This intimate time Jesus had with His disciples covers all four chapters of John 13, 14, 15 and 16. In the middle of this very intimate time, Jesus made this declaration:
Whoever has my commandments and keeps them,
he it is who loves me.
And he who loves me will be loved by my Father,
and I will love him and manifest myself to him.”
John 14:21
he it is who loves me.
And he who loves me will be loved by my Father,
and I will love him and manifest myself to him.”
John 14:21
All the commandments are included in this statement, but Jesus was most likely thinking primarily of the new commandment He had previously given them as recorded in John 13. Before letting them know that real love for Him is obeying His commands, Jesus declared this new commandment.
"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another:
just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another."
John 13:34
just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another."
John 13:34
Then, after letting them know that they only truly love Him only if they obey His commands, Jesus repeated the new commandment.
"This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you.”
John 15:12
John 15:12
There is no other command recorded in the last moments of Jesus’ life. So, it seems this command to love one another as He had loved his disciples is the way to truly love Jesus. It appears to be the primary command linked to the promise of additional love from the Father, extra love from the Son, and a special personal manifestation of Jesus.
The key concept grievously overlooked is the phrase, “as I have loved you.” This indicates that the love must be “up close and personal”. Jesus had loved the disciples in daily life. Jesus is asking for biblical love by Christian individuals to be extended to those in their “Christian Inner Circles” with whom they spend most of their time. Christian friendships, Christian families, and Christian marriages are where believers best show Jesus they love Him.
Christians who want to love Jesus as he has requested, will need to know what our Lord’s “inner circle love” looked like with His disciples. The four gospel narratives do not give much detail about His loving relationship with the disciples. But, we can safely assume that he loved them as taught in Scripture. The 65 Togethers and the Scriptures from which they come are all aspects of biblical love through denying self for the good of others. These spell out the way Jesus loved his disciples. Implementing them, and not just in their easiest expression, gives Jesus the love He wants.
Obeying the Scriptures of the Togethers yields the overlooked surprise of John 14:21. Even though God the Father loves us already, and Jesus loves us already, there evidently is bonus love contingent upon our loving those in our Christian Inner Circles deeply. Wouldn’t we want to have an extra helping of love from God the Father? Wouldn’t we want bonus love from Jesus? And, wouldn’t we want Jesus to show Himself to us in a more personal way?
If we asked 100 Christians if they love Jesus, all of them would likely reply, “yes”. But, I wonder what answers we would get if we asked, “What is the main thing you do to show Jesus you love Him?” It would be wonderful if they answered, “I go far out of my way to love those in my Christian Inner Circle in the self-denying ways instructed in Scripture.” However, we would more likely hear things like, “I go to church.” “I study my Bible.” “I pray.” “I worship.” All these are wonderful and necessary, but not what Jesus specifically requested just before He died for us.
As long as the devil can keep us thinking that our growth in Christ is something we can accomplish without one another’s help, we will make really slow progress in prayer, trusting God, and a hundred other things of faith we really want. We are held back by sermons that instruct individual obedience, church structures that prevent getting to know people well enough, and books that tell us what to change but not how to do it within the helpful relationships the Bible says are necessary.
Serious students of the Bible will readily see that God desires, wants and explicitly commands a plural expression of faith through Christian relationships. Unfortunately, this is obscured by the English language that strips its pronouns and verbs of their plurality in translation from the Greek.
Although we usually miss the plurality in Scripture, it is everywhere. We are to wait and hope on the Lord together. That’s why there is more than one eagle in Isaiah 40:31. We are to primarily focus on all of us – that is why all of the Lord’s Prayer is in the plural. Loving relationships far superior to those of secular relationships is to be our primary witness – that’s how Jesus said people would know we are truly his disciples (John 13:35). It is the church that is the recipient of the “all things happen for good” of Romans 8:28. And it is the church first and the individual only by inclusion in the church that is being completed as the Greek plurality of Philippians 1:6 clearly shows but the English language hides.
Yet, Satan’s strategy can be defeated by Christian friendships, marriages and families that comprehend the plurality throughout the Bible. In these relationships there is enough natural time together as well as commitment to one another to get down in the trenches of real life and help. In their smaller size of only a few Christians, Jesus will be there in a special way to help us handle the difficult situations thrown at us.
For a moment imagine how attractive the Christian faith could be in these basic relationships of friendships, families and marriages.
Not enough attention has been given to the spiritual helpfulness of Christian friendships. Much has been written about Christian marriage and Christian family, although very little about helping one another spiritually. Certainly the breadth of the Togethers has not been taught. Small groups in the church have been recommended for spiritual growth, but they are not nearly as powerful as those Christian friendships where contact is regular, frequent and long-lasting and trust has grown into transparency over months and years. Within these friendships Christianity can burn the hottest.
Small friendship groups that remember to come together always in the name (authority) of Jesus will have Him there to help them, guide them as a team for one another’s faith, and lead them into many exciting moments of ministry. For example, two or three friends with Jesus playing miniature golf might get the strong sense that Jesus wants them to do something. Perhaps He wants them to help one of their party who is demeaning herself because of poor performance, probably an indication of a more serious problem the Lord wants to heal. Or the Lord might ask them to extend themselves as salt and light by lifting the spirits of the group playing in front of them who seem to be struggling to have a good time.
Again, think of a group of Christian friends at work who are listening to Jesus and His concerns for others and the workplace as a whole. Over the course of time, Jesus might ask them as a friendship group to help someone perform better so he or she does not get fired, pray with someone whose wife or husband is thinking of divorce, or confront management about poor and dangerous working conditions.
Or Jesus might ask a group of friends at an organizational church to help someone who seems always alone. He might ask them to introduce the person to two other lonely people and help them form an “inner circle” of their own for a more productive spiritual life.
Think of the social and evangelistic impact on our communities if hundreds of friendship groups lived this way – Jesus with them, leading and empowering them.
Furthermore, families that recognize Jesus in their midst will also live quite differently. Recognizing is more than merely “knowing” that He is with them. It involves listening for Him to request something in the relationships between family members as well as tasks for the family as a whole to do for God’s glory.
Parents will lead the family as a society of believers rather than merely a collection of individuals. (See Appendix A.) Dads and moms will empower the family as a whole to do most of the tasks that life sends their way. Everyone will practice the Togethers and individuals will be a part of the whole family rather than merely attached superficially. One child’s problems with school will be everyone’s struggle and help will be offered from every family member. Parents will remember that the Holy Spirit also empowers children to help parents as well as siblings.
Family members will learn to listen for the voice of Jesus through their Bibles and their consciences. Jesus will be asking them to pitch in and help one another with the problems and challenges of life. The Lord may ask the family unit to serve relatives and neighbors, plan enjoyable events, help each other live faithfully, etc.
Think of the social and evangelistic impact on our communities if hundreds of families lived this way – Jesus with them and leading them.
And marriages can be more aware that Jesus is with them and would like to guide the behavior of the spouses. If marriages will go further to practice the deeper love as Scripture calls for and is described by the Togethers, there would be vast improvement in marital relationships and stability. This help from each other will create the glue of appreciation that will enhance and guarantee the marital relationship.
Wherever husbands and wives are, they can be aware that Jesus is with them and needs them to help each other. As each other’s primary helper, spouses should constantly be checking in with Jesus as to what help needs to be given to the other and how it is to be applied. The long-term nature of marriage allows for patient and loving spiritual help to be given over long periods of time. Jesus may point out that a spouse is too in love with money and a fast, direct, frontal approach would be doomed to failure. Instead, Jesus might order a long-term approach that includes Bible study about money and gentle input regarding spending decisions.
Also, the long-term relationship of marriage usually brings annoyances and relationship problems that will force transformation into the image of Christ more than most other relationships. The fact that husbands and wives can “drive one another up the wall” is probably good, not bad – if faced as an opportunity to become like Jesus. The marriage with conscious awareness of Jesus’ presence will listen for His comfort and leading through the long path of understanding and love.
Then there is the fact that Jesus will give many ministry tasks to a couple that truly lives conscious of His presence. They will go with Jesus to help neighbors, relatives, church congregations, strangers and those in need facing various situations and places.
Think of the social and evangelistic impact on our communities if hundreds of marriages lived this way – Jesus with them and leading them.
There is presently little to no help in the organizational church for friendship groups, families and marriages to become the powerhouses of the faith they are meant to be. There is so much more that church leaders can do.
Pastors need to admonish listeners to sermons to make sure the teaching takes root in the lives of each of their closest friends. Because of our autonomous culture, helping one another grasp and apply truth will not happen automatically. Pastors will have to tell friends how to help one another grow in what the sermon has just instructed.
Husbands and wives also need to be commissioned to help one another see the teaching of the sermon through to completion. They, too, will have to be told how to help each other, usually over the long run. This will be somewhat different than how friends will help each other.
Plus, kids and parents will have to be told in the sermon that they can do a lot to help one another make the change highlighted in the teaching. Kids will especially need careful instruction on how to do this with each other, as well as with their parents.
Unfortunately, when friendships, families and marriages are left out of sermons and the books Christians read, those basic social units of the church do not know that they need to do much of anything. Yet they are absolutely necessary for spiritual growth, obedience, and preparation for heaven. They are the very basic building blocks of any organizational church.
The organized church should be a gathering of many “twos and threes with Jesus”. Normally, it is just a gathering of “ones”. Surely there is a time and place for large gatherings of Christians, but the stronger the “friendships with Jesus”, the “families with Jesus”, and the “marriages with Jesus”, the stronger and more obedient will be the larger organizational church and its programs.
Christian friendships, Christian families, and Christian marriages are the powerful relationships where the ways of God’s Kingdom can be implemented at the level that makes us more like Jesus, brings forth personally-expensive worship, creates in us the power to defeat evil, prepares us for heaven’s relationships and rewards, and bonds us with God Almighty for eternity.
The key concept grievously overlooked is the phrase, “as I have loved you.” This indicates that the love must be “up close and personal”. Jesus had loved the disciples in daily life. Jesus is asking for biblical love by Christian individuals to be extended to those in their “Christian Inner Circles” with whom they spend most of their time. Christian friendships, Christian families, and Christian marriages are where believers best show Jesus they love Him.
Christians who want to love Jesus as he has requested, will need to know what our Lord’s “inner circle love” looked like with His disciples. The four gospel narratives do not give much detail about His loving relationship with the disciples. But, we can safely assume that he loved them as taught in Scripture. The 65 Togethers and the Scriptures from which they come are all aspects of biblical love through denying self for the good of others. These spell out the way Jesus loved his disciples. Implementing them, and not just in their easiest expression, gives Jesus the love He wants.
Obeying the Scriptures of the Togethers yields the overlooked surprise of John 14:21. Even though God the Father loves us already, and Jesus loves us already, there evidently is bonus love contingent upon our loving those in our Christian Inner Circles deeply. Wouldn’t we want to have an extra helping of love from God the Father? Wouldn’t we want bonus love from Jesus? And, wouldn’t we want Jesus to show Himself to us in a more personal way?
If we asked 100 Christians if they love Jesus, all of them would likely reply, “yes”. But, I wonder what answers we would get if we asked, “What is the main thing you do to show Jesus you love Him?” It would be wonderful if they answered, “I go far out of my way to love those in my Christian Inner Circle in the self-denying ways instructed in Scripture.” However, we would more likely hear things like, “I go to church.” “I study my Bible.” “I pray.” “I worship.” All these are wonderful and necessary, but not what Jesus specifically requested just before He died for us.
As long as the devil can keep us thinking that our growth in Christ is something we can accomplish without one another’s help, we will make really slow progress in prayer, trusting God, and a hundred other things of faith we really want. We are held back by sermons that instruct individual obedience, church structures that prevent getting to know people well enough, and books that tell us what to change but not how to do it within the helpful relationships the Bible says are necessary.
Serious students of the Bible will readily see that God desires, wants and explicitly commands a plural expression of faith through Christian relationships. Unfortunately, this is obscured by the English language that strips its pronouns and verbs of their plurality in translation from the Greek.
Although we usually miss the plurality in Scripture, it is everywhere. We are to wait and hope on the Lord together. That’s why there is more than one eagle in Isaiah 40:31. We are to primarily focus on all of us – that is why all of the Lord’s Prayer is in the plural. Loving relationships far superior to those of secular relationships is to be our primary witness – that’s how Jesus said people would know we are truly his disciples (John 13:35). It is the church that is the recipient of the “all things happen for good” of Romans 8:28. And it is the church first and the individual only by inclusion in the church that is being completed as the Greek plurality of Philippians 1:6 clearly shows but the English language hides.
Yet, Satan’s strategy can be defeated by Christian friendships, marriages and families that comprehend the plurality throughout the Bible. In these relationships there is enough natural time together as well as commitment to one another to get down in the trenches of real life and help. In their smaller size of only a few Christians, Jesus will be there in a special way to help us handle the difficult situations thrown at us.
For a moment imagine how attractive the Christian faith could be in these basic relationships of friendships, families and marriages.
Not enough attention has been given to the spiritual helpfulness of Christian friendships. Much has been written about Christian marriage and Christian family, although very little about helping one another spiritually. Certainly the breadth of the Togethers has not been taught. Small groups in the church have been recommended for spiritual growth, but they are not nearly as powerful as those Christian friendships where contact is regular, frequent and long-lasting and trust has grown into transparency over months and years. Within these friendships Christianity can burn the hottest.
Small friendship groups that remember to come together always in the name (authority) of Jesus will have Him there to help them, guide them as a team for one another’s faith, and lead them into many exciting moments of ministry. For example, two or three friends with Jesus playing miniature golf might get the strong sense that Jesus wants them to do something. Perhaps He wants them to help one of their party who is demeaning herself because of poor performance, probably an indication of a more serious problem the Lord wants to heal. Or the Lord might ask them to extend themselves as salt and light by lifting the spirits of the group playing in front of them who seem to be struggling to have a good time.
Again, think of a group of Christian friends at work who are listening to Jesus and His concerns for others and the workplace as a whole. Over the course of time, Jesus might ask them as a friendship group to help someone perform better so he or she does not get fired, pray with someone whose wife or husband is thinking of divorce, or confront management about poor and dangerous working conditions.
Or Jesus might ask a group of friends at an organizational church to help someone who seems always alone. He might ask them to introduce the person to two other lonely people and help them form an “inner circle” of their own for a more productive spiritual life.
Think of the social and evangelistic impact on our communities if hundreds of friendship groups lived this way – Jesus with them, leading and empowering them.
Furthermore, families that recognize Jesus in their midst will also live quite differently. Recognizing is more than merely “knowing” that He is with them. It involves listening for Him to request something in the relationships between family members as well as tasks for the family as a whole to do for God’s glory.
Parents will lead the family as a society of believers rather than merely a collection of individuals. (See Appendix A.) Dads and moms will empower the family as a whole to do most of the tasks that life sends their way. Everyone will practice the Togethers and individuals will be a part of the whole family rather than merely attached superficially. One child’s problems with school will be everyone’s struggle and help will be offered from every family member. Parents will remember that the Holy Spirit also empowers children to help parents as well as siblings.
Family members will learn to listen for the voice of Jesus through their Bibles and their consciences. Jesus will be asking them to pitch in and help one another with the problems and challenges of life. The Lord may ask the family unit to serve relatives and neighbors, plan enjoyable events, help each other live faithfully, etc.
Think of the social and evangelistic impact on our communities if hundreds of families lived this way – Jesus with them and leading them.
And marriages can be more aware that Jesus is with them and would like to guide the behavior of the spouses. If marriages will go further to practice the deeper love as Scripture calls for and is described by the Togethers, there would be vast improvement in marital relationships and stability. This help from each other will create the glue of appreciation that will enhance and guarantee the marital relationship.
Wherever husbands and wives are, they can be aware that Jesus is with them and needs them to help each other. As each other’s primary helper, spouses should constantly be checking in with Jesus as to what help needs to be given to the other and how it is to be applied. The long-term nature of marriage allows for patient and loving spiritual help to be given over long periods of time. Jesus may point out that a spouse is too in love with money and a fast, direct, frontal approach would be doomed to failure. Instead, Jesus might order a long-term approach that includes Bible study about money and gentle input regarding spending decisions.
Also, the long-term relationship of marriage usually brings annoyances and relationship problems that will force transformation into the image of Christ more than most other relationships. The fact that husbands and wives can “drive one another up the wall” is probably good, not bad – if faced as an opportunity to become like Jesus. The marriage with conscious awareness of Jesus’ presence will listen for His comfort and leading through the long path of understanding and love.
Then there is the fact that Jesus will give many ministry tasks to a couple that truly lives conscious of His presence. They will go with Jesus to help neighbors, relatives, church congregations, strangers and those in need facing various situations and places.
Think of the social and evangelistic impact on our communities if hundreds of marriages lived this way – Jesus with them and leading them.
There is presently little to no help in the organizational church for friendship groups, families and marriages to become the powerhouses of the faith they are meant to be. There is so much more that church leaders can do.
Pastors need to admonish listeners to sermons to make sure the teaching takes root in the lives of each of their closest friends. Because of our autonomous culture, helping one another grasp and apply truth will not happen automatically. Pastors will have to tell friends how to help one another grow in what the sermon has just instructed.
Husbands and wives also need to be commissioned to help one another see the teaching of the sermon through to completion. They, too, will have to be told how to help each other, usually over the long run. This will be somewhat different than how friends will help each other.
Plus, kids and parents will have to be told in the sermon that they can do a lot to help one another make the change highlighted in the teaching. Kids will especially need careful instruction on how to do this with each other, as well as with their parents.
Unfortunately, when friendships, families and marriages are left out of sermons and the books Christians read, those basic social units of the church do not know that they need to do much of anything. Yet they are absolutely necessary for spiritual growth, obedience, and preparation for heaven. They are the very basic building blocks of any organizational church.
The organized church should be a gathering of many “twos and threes with Jesus”. Normally, it is just a gathering of “ones”. Surely there is a time and place for large gatherings of Christians, but the stronger the “friendships with Jesus”, the “families with Jesus”, and the “marriages with Jesus”, the stronger and more obedient will be the larger organizational church and its programs.
Christian friendships, Christian families, and Christian marriages are the powerful relationships where the ways of God’s Kingdom can be implemented at the level that makes us more like Jesus, brings forth personally-expensive worship, creates in us the power to defeat evil, prepares us for heaven’s relationships and rewards, and bonds us with God Almighty for eternity.